Confident You NETWORK with Marion Swingler
Welcome to Confident You Network, Confident You! The ultimate destination for cultivating unwavering confidence in every facet of life! Join us on a transformative journey through insightful interviews, enlightening group conversations, and thought-provoking revelations that empower you with the tools, tactics, and mindset needed to clarify, cultivate, and reaffirm confidence.
Tune in to the Confident You Podcast, where we bring you in-depth conversations with experts and thought leaders, exploring diverse perspectives on confidence and personal growth. Discover practical tips and real-life experiences that will inspire and guide you on your path to becoming the most confident version of yourself.
But wait, the confident networking does not end there! Join us for Confident You BONUS episodes, the conversation after the podcast, on THE AFTER PARTY where we delve deeper sharing intimate vulnerabilities and insight for personal, relational, emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual growth.
Confident You is not just a podcast; it's a community dedicated to boosting your self-assurance and helping you thrive in all aspects of life. So do what you do, grab a seat, take a walk, take a drive, and hit play, to embark on this empowering journey together. Get ready to ignite the confidence in you that always grows with positive building input.
Confident You NETWORK with Marion Swingler
BONUS #1 THE AFTER PARTY: THE EASY WAY TO LOSS WEIGHT: How to Shed Pounds and Walk in Emotional Fitness with George aka MR. HIGHLIFE from CYP eps 27
WELCOME TO THE AFTER PARTY!!! - The fantastic conversation with the guest after an episode of Confident Your Podcast.
I can't hold The After Party conversations to myself. Keeping the conversation growing after a Confident You Podcast episode comes with joy, pain, sunshine, rain, and an abundance of Happy Feelings!
First up on THE AFTER PARTY!!! is our guest from episode 27, "LIVING THE HIGH LIFE!!!" George, aka MR. HIGHLIFE himself. If you have yet to see episode 27, then you must go back and watch it to get the full context of all he shared.
Born George Varner Jr. and known in the industry as Mr. HighLife, he is a 42-year-old single father to 3 daughters (2 living with him - Aliyah & Amir, and 1 angel watching over him - Aysha). He is the founder and CEO of HighLife Films & Photography LLC. His infectiously joyous perspective, can-do-anything execution, and remarkably keen eye have afforded him the priceless opportunities of working with 100s of artists (including Jill Scott, Brandy, Fantasia, Monica, Ashanti, Fat Joe, Ja Rule, Nick Jonas, Fifth Harmony, and on and on). Mr. HighLife is a Co-Creator of HIGHer Learning HighLife Book Club and Scholarship, inspired by being an avid reader seeking knowledge. He wears many hats, such as Real estate photographer, videographer, content creator, real estate investor, author, loving father, supportive friend, motivational mentor/coach, and great man.
In this episode George shares how he stepped on the scale and saw 345 pounds, he knew it was time for a drastic change. His story of dropping nearly 100 pounds is not just about weight loss; it's a profound tale of personal transformation that could inspire anyone to take action in their own life. As a guest on our podcast, George takes us through the highs and lows of his journey, emphasizing the role of discipline, from tackling the 75 Hard Challenge to finding solace in the gym amidst life's toughest challenges.
This episode goes beyond physical health, delving into the emotional resilience that comes from overcoming adversity. George opens up about his battles with depression, the loss of a child, and a divorce, and how these events were catalysts for his transformation. The discussion also touches on the principles of parenthood and the pursuit of growth, where actions speak louder than wishes. We share the power of journaling, the clarity that comes from self-reflection, and the nuances of personal history that shape our future.
Rounding off our conversation, we celebrate the milestones that make life worth living. From the excitement of capturing live performances through a videographer's lens to the thrill of personal achievements, George’s experiences shine a light on the importance of gratitude and living up to our family legacies. His story is a compelling reminder that no matter where we start, the pursuit of a healthier, more confident self can lead to a future we can be proud of. Join us as we uncover the layers of living a life with intention, through the eyes of someone who's walked the path of true transformation.
A few of his favorite quotes that he lives by are:
“1+1=3” “Do Something Today That Your Future Self Will Thank You For!” “Put Some Respect On Your Mind!”
“I learn something from everyone I meet, even if it is what NOT to do!”
CONTACT:
www.HighLifeStateOfMind.com
Highlifefilms2010@gmail.com
SOCIAL MEDIA:
INSTAGRAM - @mr_highlifefilms
TWITTER - @mrhighlifefilms
FACEBOOK - business page HighLife Films & Photography LLC
PRIVATE BOOK CLUB on FACEBOOK -
HIGHer Learning: HighLife Book Club
BOOK:HIGHLIFE: 8 Keys To Living An Abundant Life www.HighLifeStateOfMind.com
GEAR: Grab some HIGHLIFE™️ Gear www.donthatemecuzimhigh.com
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FOR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HELP
Call for more information on d
Confident. You is where it's at. Listen, we are now officially in the after party. George, you are infectious. You're an amazing, an amazing being. We left off in the episode something I said not Tune in to the after party if you wanna find out about this, 75. Explain to the people what it is, how you started, why you started and how you did it. And you made it look easy.
Speaker 2:Yes. So 75 Hard is a challenge. It's all over the internet, anyone can do it. It's free, no charge. I like free stuff too, so it's free.
Speaker 2:As for me, and give me three, that was a model I had in college so it stuck with me, but I signed up because I'm big on health. I used to be 345 pounds. I'm gonna say that one more time 345. Right now I'm currently 250. My goal weight is 227, between 227 and 236. That's my goal.
Speaker 2:It's not something that I've done over the 75, but it's something that I've done over the past. I wanna say two years I've been. You know, it started off with me just walking daily and just walking around the block to walking for 45 minutes, and then I got tired of no, I wanted to walk a mile and I got tired of the mile taking too long to walk. So I started running a little bit, got a little tired, walk, run, walk, run, walk. And it's been a journey that I I used to like. I said I shoot videos. I was doing some real estate shots, making a video for a client one time and I went to go listen to the video Like I had to sing. All I could hear was ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah ah. Sound like an obscene phone call.
Speaker 2:So I was like oh, ah, ah, oh, ah, ah, ah, ah. This can't be, this ain't life. So I had a health scare also. I had to go to the doctor and they said I had. I didn't have it. I was on my way to have a sleep apnea and you know, they'll say either you can get on the breathing machine at night or you can lose the weight. And I said so. I actually tried to breathe the machine. I went and got tested with the breathing machine and I was in that thing for all of a. I pulled the sleep overnight in it about 30 minutes. I was like, ah, ah, ah. I was like no locked doors, this is too. I ain't finna have this whole mask on my face all night. I can't roll over. I wake up, I'm panicking. I'm like uh, uh, uh.
Speaker 1:So I was like everything is not for everyone.
Speaker 2:Uh-uh, I felt closed, locked up. No, I don't like that. And so I was like you know what? I'm gonna lose this weight. And ever since then I wanna see my kids, you know, grow old. I wanna enjoy, you know, when they. I see my son running around, I wanna be able to go play, hide and go see with him and go race him, race my daughter and you know, see who the fastest of the family, and just have fun. And I can't do that if I'm over here three, four to five. You know, and you know it's a lot of stuff that was cut off to me and I didn't like it. So I started that journey and I actually joined a gym called L45. That was one of the turning points in my life and I did that. I'm actually still a member. I go every morning at 5 am, so I'm up at 4 am, go work out at 5 am and we work out for 45 minutes, get it in, and that was something that really like start pushing the needle. So once I got out of 300 club, I started L45. And then from there I've been from the. I went from the 300 down to where I'm at now 250. And I just did a thing called the 75 Heart Challenge, which is 75 days and it's not just physical, it's mental and you know.
Speaker 2:So some of the challenges, things that you have to do. You have to drink a gallon of water a day. That was one. I once I had kidney stones. One time kidney stones will make you want to drink some water. I'm gonna tell you that. I'm just gonna tell you that I'm gonna leave it at that.
Speaker 2:Kidney stones will change your life. You wouldn't want to drink nothing else, but so you have to drink a gallon of water every day. You have to pick a diet and you have to stick to that diet. No cheat meals no, oh, today I'm gonna take it just one day. I'm just gonna no cheat meals for 75 days. You have to no alcohol. What else is there? You have to do two 45 minute workouts every day for 75 days. So no, no rest day. So you have to do, and one of the workouts has to be outside. So funny story is, when I first started, probably on like day three, it was a storm outside. I'm talking about Jesus was outside and he was angry. It was lightning, it was thunder and all that stuff and I was like uh-oh.
Speaker 1:Did you see the boat go by? Almost See Noah in the art, the chair he was almost there.
Speaker 2:It was almost that time, and so I was kind of like, what are we gonna do? And so happens that it ended up passing over. But it was late it was probably like 10, 30 at night and I was like, well, I guess I gotta go for a walk or something. And we ended up going for a walk, slash run, walking a little bit, ran a little bit and ended up knocking it out. And that taught me a valuable lesson like no excuses, like if you're intentional about what you're gonna do with your health, then you'll find a way to get that workout in. So once, like I said, I work at F-45 five o'clock in the morning. That's not the first workout, I got that out of the way. But then the second exercise gotta be outside. So now I'll either walk in the afternoon with the kids or with my one girl, or I'll go for a nice little jog or play basketball outside. Do something outside, yeah, do something outside. Ride the bicycle and do that. And also the last one, my favorite, it was actually super easy for me.
Speaker 2:I kind of thought I was cheating, but you have to read 10 pages a day of a nonfiction book. I'm like, sign me up twice, but I read three books a day, yeah, yeah. So I read three books a day, not the full book. I don't go through a whole book in one sitting, so I'll read when I first get up. In the morning I'll read like an older book. Right now I'm reading Charlie Munger's. It's called Poor Charlie's Armonat yeah, armonat, and it's a Charlie Munger, warren Buffett's best friend. It's a book you know a lot of wisdom, financing and business stuff like that An older book. You read something that got some like a thinking-grown rich, a classic book in the morning. Right In the afternoon, around lunchtime, if you wanna take a nap or you wanna read during lunchtime, you read a how-to book.
Speaker 2:So right now I'm learning Latin. I'm relearning Latin. I was taking it in sixth grade before my mom passed and then when she passed I just kinda like threw it out the window. So right now I'm relearning Latin. So in the afternoon I'll do either a Latin lesson on Duolingo or I have some dictionaries or I have. You know, I just read something in Latin for 15, 20 minutes of the day. Boom, do that. And then at nighttime, before I go to sleep, I'll read something motivational. So it could be anything. I was reading UOU Right now once again. I got a book club, so in the afternoon I've been reading the book club as well. Plus, we got the live book read every read in the morning, whatever book we read on that.
Speaker 2:So it's like that was like the easy part to satisfy our heart. For me, and you know, it just taught me discipline. It taught me how you know creating habits, replacing bad habits with good habits, being intentional. The discipline part was huge because, you know, it reminded me of Mike Tyson when he said his definition of discipline was doing something you don't like doing, but doing like you love doing it. And you know working out is one of those things like when you're doing it, you like what did I sign up for? Every time I go in the L45 and we have halfway through I'd be like what did I sign up for? But now I like it because I've seen the results.
Speaker 2:I like that I can look past my stomach now I can look down and see my feet and I can see the changes in my body. You know my breathing. You know, like I said, we run me and my daughter and my, for my daughter, my kids and my girl. We go running every weekend, on a Saturday morning, sunday morning, we go for a run. We got bridges down here in Jacksonville, so it's like three bridges in downtown Jacksonville and we go, we run across the bridge, then we'll walk to the next bridge. While we're walking, we have a discussion, I might be doing some push ups or something, and then we get to the next bridge, we run, walk and run, you know, and and I can see the changes in my body and I can see, I can feel the changes. I can feel I feel I got more energy out here, more.
Speaker 2:I want to get on camera now. You know, before my excuse was oh man, I'm the cameraman, let me get behind the camera. I'm just the cameraman because I wasn't confident. I want to confident you, you know. For now, put me on the camera. Y'all are going to get all of this right here. Y'all go see this, and soon it's going to be. I ain't going to be out there. You have to pay me to put a shirt on.
Speaker 1:That part right there, that part right there. He said it For real.
Speaker 2:We out here, we out here.
Speaker 1:Who is that? There's an actor that never has a shirt on Older white gentlemen, but he cut and everybody say yo, he don't never got no shirt on, that's going to be me. Oh, my God never.
Speaker 2:They gonna be like man you have. We've been going to church man you got to put a shirt on you show. He say come as you are.
Speaker 1:Come as you are. This is what I got. This is these ads.
Speaker 2:You gotta take it I believe it, I got two of them, two of girls. I was like, oh, not two ads, they in there. They been in there the whole time.
Speaker 1:They trying out, hiding, they like he ready, he ready, he ready. So I just you said a lot. I think I just had my mind going just on the journey that you just explained. But I want to step back before we step forward. I want to step back. The old you, what was making him 300 plus pounds?
Speaker 2:I think lifestyle and what I was doing me being a creator it'd be late Night. That's when I did my best work late night. So the snacking, eating after 12 or eating late night and you going to sleep thinking that you done digest your body not getting the rest that you need because it's trying to so fight the desperately digested food that you just ate one o'clock in the morning and you wake up groggy and stuff because you ain't getting no rest, because your body was working all night long to keep you everything flowing. And it was just me being a videographer. I was okay with the nightlife. That's where I, when I was on the bad side, that's when I hung out the daytime, I was the heart.
Speaker 2:You know you was yeah, hey hi, this is high life, yes, but at night time it was like oh, this is high life, what's up, let's get this work. Let's get this work, oh pause.
Speaker 1:You won't go by that. Did your voice just drop High life? What were you just doing just now?
Speaker 2:What was that that? I don't know what you're talking about. Yo, one, two, three, four, fifth. Keep the fifth. One, two, three, four, fifth.
Speaker 1:It is I just want to make. We was okay, okay. So in the past, do you feel like there was a reason? Was there anything that you can say were triggers? Besides the late night eating? Looking back emotionally or psychologically, was there something that? Was causing you to say it again Depression.
Speaker 2:You know I was going through a lot. I've been divorced, I lost a child, I lost my grandmother. My grandmother passed in my arms. I was the last person she saw before she said the last person she told she loved was me. She said that and those were her last words was saying that she loved me. That do something to a person, especially when you're still out here trying to figure out your life and figure out what's going on, to lose somebody who is like your last piece of your mom. It does something to you.
Speaker 2:I don't like making excuses, but I can see that that had something to do with it. Well, I go eat or I just wouldn't go work out. I wouldn't go for no walk, ain't no walk in and going to the gym. Even when I played football in high school and college, I was never one of the gym rats. I was never one of the guys. That was all. I was just naturally talented because I played football all my life. I never worked out like that, so it was like that wasn't my go to when stuff got like now I can't go without going to the gym. I feel a type of way If I don't go to the gym, I'll be looking like man. My back hurt. I need to go to the gym.
Speaker 1:It's going to work out. It's going to work out. It's going to work it out. You said something. You said I would play football and I did it. You see how you messing with me, right? You said I would play football and I wasn't a gym rat, but you also explained all the things that you went through. Can I ask, would you say that possibly anger would feed you, could feed off of the anger inside of you to do the things that you did on the football field? Or was there something?
Speaker 2:Football was just something I love. Actually, really, football was football. Yeah, from the time I was born, my dad put a big old if you see my baby picture.
Speaker 2:I got a big old football, bigger than me, right next to ugly football too. I went no nice love. This is in the 80s, so this is when I'm old school. Football is bigger than the baby and it was just like if I was attracted to football all my life. From the time I go walk, I was playing football. That time I can go outside and play, I'm playing football. If you're looking for me, I'm playing football. It don't matter what season of the year it is, I was playing football and that's pretty much all I knew and all I wanted to do.
Speaker 2:I remember one time I was a straight A student until the sixth grade, no, until the fifth grade. And I got a B no, no, I got a C. I went from straight A's to a C and my mama took me out to football team. That was the worst day of my life. Do you know? My coach literally had to come there and beg my mom for me to play because I was such an intricate part of the team and he literally had to beg. My mom was like I don't play. I play about a lot of stuff, but no Graves ain't one. Like I told you, my mom was a history teacher and she did not play by that school. And if I don't do that, right, you can't do nothing else, right? So how you do anything and how you do everything, and she was definitely taught me that. And you know, once I've seen that, oh, you take football away, if I don't get, oh, let's go back to what I was doing.
Speaker 2:But then that's when she started going through her health issues. And then it wasn't really, you know, I was affected from her. She was going through cancer. It was like I was going through cancer too, because I was affected by how it did her body, how you see that beautiful froze she had. But then she was, she had to go through chemo and it took all her hair out and you know, she was, her confidence kind of went down. But, you know, and I had to be her light and it just Godly, not even thinking about it, I'm like, wow, I was inspiring my mom to keep fighting. You know what I mean? Not even knowing, but she inspired me in so many ways. Like I told you, I didn't get in trouble with the law until I was like 26, 27. And my mom passed when I was 12. So she put some stuff in me. Well, you know, I was like I know right from wrong.
Speaker 1:It sounds like you have proven the equation of one plus one equaling three, because you and your mom. She was inspired by you and you were inspired by her long past, her going head up to yonder.
Speaker 2:To the day, to this day, to this day, to this day is still equals three.
Speaker 1:My God, so beautiful. Now I'm going to go forward, now that you finished that 75. What does tomorrow look like when you wake up, since you're not on a regiment that you have to get? Yeah, you got to make a plan.
Speaker 2:It's a habit, it's a habit, so it's like one thing about it that the wake up five in the morning, I mean a workout five in the morning, that's that's for life for me. Now I'm part of the five AM club for real, for real. That's one of my favorite books as well, and I'm definitely a member of the five AM club because that's just something that I don't even have to think about it. I just wake up like like the living day. I'm like, oh time to go work out.
Speaker 1:I'm late.
Speaker 2:I'm running late, let me go, and that's just a part of my life that I'm happy that I can't. That I'm you know, I wish I. I'm going to say I was. I take that back to be I don't wish, because we say nothing but a goal with no effort behind it.
Speaker 1:But I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, oh.
Speaker 2:I said I don't wish, because a wish is nothing but a goal with no effort behind it. I wish I hit the lottery. I don't play the lotto.
Speaker 1:I was going to say I I'm too too. I ain't giving you my dollar. Ain't that something I know I'm not giving?
Speaker 2:you. You won't tax me three times. I'm not giving you my, so that's how I yeah, that's a whole another, that's a whole other podcast.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you see me holding it in. I got a story and everything I'm like, hold it.
Speaker 2:Hold it A billion dollars. I don't want that. You going to take half of it.
Speaker 1:That's okay, I'll take the half, it's just.
Speaker 2:I'm not going to tax you for 40% of that half.
Speaker 1:That's okay, but the the issue is that I'm I don't get started. I can't like that.
Speaker 2:I think we're going to move that, that's no, I wouldn't have that rabbit hole one time in my life too. So I'm not a gambler anymore. Okay yeah, no way, no way, yeah, I don't wish no more I get out here and go get it. It's rightfully mine If they have a billion dollars there where you can go win it. There's a billion dollars out there for you to go. Get it too. Go get it. Okay, so how do you? Because guess what.
Speaker 1:Getting it quickly. That's how fast it's going to go, Because you didn't learn the process and the value of it as you earned it. So that's that, but um, I don't know how to say it, but um, at least that's what I think of that. If you want to expound on it, you're more than welcome. But I just wanted to know. You said the 5 am, what else are you keeping implementing in your life from the 75?
Speaker 2:Water.
Speaker 1:What is it?
Speaker 2:Water, water. Where's my jug at?
Speaker 1:My jug must be in the kitchen.
Speaker 2:I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I guess what I did today so I was so excited about, you know, being the last day of the set, if I hard. I was done with my gallon at 8 am. I woke up at four o'clock. I was done with my gallon at 8 am when I worked out. I was chucking that thing Workout, workout, workout, and then afterward the whole trip home I'm drinking. I was done, I was done. I just didn't stop because I was happy to drink all that water, but I didn't stop as soon as I hit my goal. It's just a habit now. I was drinking water all day long. I love it. I feel like I'm getting a little light skin.
Speaker 1:I feel so clear. Look at you, look at your particles over there, so clean. Look at you, look at your face.
Speaker 2:Look at that.
Speaker 1:Okay, only if you let them. Don't start me on that one. Don't start me.
Speaker 2:I would throw you a whole bunch of alley-oops, you don't know who you're messing with.
Speaker 1:Listen, because you can't hold God's hand back. Only if you let them, because the first step starts with you accepting.
Speaker 2:I just want to jam to the music on that one. I'm going to go and jam to the music on that one.
Speaker 1:It is. Oh my God, yes, that's the high life films. You, you that? That, uh, those habits. So what night habit are you keeping? You gave me your morning. You gave me the water all day. What night habit.
Speaker 2:Reading. What discipline are you keeping?
Speaker 1:What discipline?
Speaker 2:are you keeping?
Speaker 1:Reading and journaling. You cheating, because reading was already your thing, we ain't even going to do that Journaling.
Speaker 2:That wasn't your thing, mm-mm, not consistent with that at all. But you know, I've, I've done my, I've got an accountability partner. By mistake I ran into somebody out doing the gig, a cool, cool white guy. It's funny because if you see him he's like the total opposite of me, kind of like Cali type of white guy. You know, at first he didn't really, he wasn't really feeling me. But once we had to start talking, you know, we kind of our goals and ambitions were kind of like online. But he's younger, he's 24. I'm 42. So once he heard you know all the stuff that I've been going through he was. He started talking about journaling. I was like I said you journal, I struggle with. I got to get better at that. He was like man, we should be accountability partner. I said you know what? Yes, we're going to. And this was.
Speaker 2:I met him two weeks ago and every day this guy hits me up and said did you journal today? I said this, and if he don't hit me up, I'll hit him up hey, man, I journaled How's your day going? Did you journal today? And that's I've been consistently for the last two weeks every day. Having missed the day of journal, I've journaled this morning and I'm going to let myself know that I'm proud of myself for getting through these 75 hard and, like I say, do something today that your future self will thank you for and put a little evidence in there, because when we get older we're going to forget a couple of these things. But if I can get sit down and I can do what I love to do read, I can read my own story.
Speaker 1:Come on here. So you're writing your autobiography now. No, actually I'm writing my second book actually right now number one, that journal, oh, the journal.
Speaker 2:Yeah, for sure, for sure, Pretty much If you want to put it in.
Speaker 1:I like that paradigm.
Speaker 2:I like that paradigm, I'll take that.
Speaker 1:So now let's go to that second book. Sir, you won you won one million dollars.
Speaker 2:Interesting, interesting. So this one might get me in a little trouble, but I want all the smoke. My second book is called that's Matter More the top 10 reasons society is lying to you about. The top 10 reasons society is lying to you about fatherhood. Yeah, that's the ebook, and then I have a hard copy book that I'm coming out with and it's called Put Some Respect on your Mind Principles for Mastering Parenthood as a Single Father.
Speaker 1:That's Matter.
Speaker 2:More going to be some. I'm going to get some smoke, though, about that one. They going to be like wait, he think he do, he think I'm a mama to end the day. But that ain't what it's about, though. It's a. You know, one of my mentors, ask Ashe. He's the one that really, pretty much I was looking my book High Life. It wasn't for a specific someone. I was living in my abundant space, so it was kind of like for whoever this message resonates with, have at it. But if it don't resonate with you, it's fine.
Speaker 2:But the coming from being a single father, I felt like there was some people I could speak to and I could really be. You know, I could bring a lot of value and I could only I could speak from my experience, and you know what I've been through, what I've seen, like I was telling you about. You know, you don't. Fathers have no rights when it comes to their kids. If you're not married, if you have your kids out of wedlock, you have no rights. You have to petition the courts for your rights, and that was a hard lesson I had to learn and I had to go through.
Speaker 2:And you know, like you said, this system wasn't built. It wasn't made for us. So you know I learned it the hard way and I got some nugget stock and you know share in there and you know it might get a little smoke because you know we have the moms that be like, well, I'm the mom and the daddy they want to get celebrated on mother's day and father's day and you can't beat a daddy, you just can't. I feel you can be a heck of a mom now Don't give me a twist. You can be 10 times, 20 times, the best mom in the world, but you can't be no daddy, you just can't. It just I ain't got to explain that anatomy.
Speaker 1:No, I am right, but I am a mom who was a single mom and still a single. It's a single mom. But was there that adolescence, that all the way up? And and I can say that when my pastor, darius Daniels of Change Church, announced that he was doing a made man's program, my son and I he was at college watching service and I was here at home watching service and we watched service together and then we call and we discuss service, how it what we saw, that we're doing right, what we need to work on and how we're going to apply the message. So we talked after service. I called him after service and I was just crying and I said I can't teach you to be a man, I can't. I need you to take this class. And he just said, yes, man, smart man, I can't teach that to you.
Speaker 1:I've done my best but I can't. I said but I can't teach that to you that's a lot of you. I taste a lot of humility and I was just crying and he was like okay, I'm a sign up today, I got it. Is it okay that? Yeah, so I'm doing good, I'm not crying right now I'm gonna be like yes, what yes?
Speaker 2:that takes a lot of that's maturity and knowing. Knowing what you don't know, not saying that makes you less of or less than just saying that you're humble enough to know. Like when people say they don't read books, I be looking at them like, okay, all right, that means you think you know it all actually no, no, I mean that's how I see it. I feel like if you're saying oh, I don't need no books, I don't need no mentor, I don't need no that's a different statement.
Speaker 1:I don't need them not.
Speaker 2:That's how I see it. When somebody said, I don't really you're so much that you don't know what you don't know yes, yeah, and we all have limits.
Speaker 1:You only can teach them what you've been taught yes, and I know how limited that is, because having my daughter at being pregnant at 19 and having her at 20, how much was I gonna teach? And I didn't do any additional schooling. I didn't do any additional anything I focused on. Let me tell you what my focus was making sure my kids didn't call my mama mama and call me by my first name. That was my determination that that was not gonna happen you call me marry, you want to?
Speaker 1:it's gonna be a problem with him. Everything on everything, I love you gonna get it, you gonna get it. So, yeah, that and it's like you just and that's something I made up in my mother yeah, just watching other kids like wait, that's your mom, do you want? To be a baby this is your mom she says okay, that's your mother, and you calling your grandma mom and then you telling your grandma, you gonna tell your mother that wasn't gonna happen. Oh girl, right here you could try. Hmm, you could try, it ain't gonna work.
Speaker 2:Well, and then at the same time, you got to give them something to you know respect and to feel like you know. That's like you said you were 19. You're still a kid, you're still a baby, you still out here trying to figure it out. I was 20. I think my daughter, my first girl down 28. Before then I was trying to, I was still trying to figure out women. I would say women mature way faster than men. You know y'all, y'all get to that aha moment quicker than we do, because we'd be out here winging it and you know we'd be thinking about one thing else, some other stuff that we don't need to be thinking about, you know.
Speaker 1:Wait, uh-huh, see that right there. I think y'all get a bad rap because I'm telling you right now is female. When I drop my son off the school I say yo watch out for them females. Mmm cuz I know us, I didn't take myself out of the equation. I know us, watch out, because if she realized you got something, I'm playing on your life, you gonna get to say Touche.
Speaker 1:It always. People always want to say it's guys and oh you better, you better watch out for them and them girls Smiling in your face and you have no idea, I see how you did that, neck, okay, yes, I've had a few conversation with a few women. I will say that that the conversation, majority of the conversation she started mmm.
Speaker 2:Well, I like how you said you called it conversation. I Always say it's the dude Nah, baby, I mean at the end of the day, wrong is wrong and right is right. Yeah, you can be a, from a man, from a woman, for whatever you call yourself, if you bad, you bad, you go say oh, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a. Sad that we just, oh, I'm a Pisces, I'm a Libra, and we just, you, just who you are, cuz who you are, you can put a label on all you want to yeah.
Speaker 2:You are who you are because you that's who you are. That's the experience, that's the people you've been around, that's the the what's the mnusha that you got in your head from everyone that you surrounded your life with your environment.
Speaker 1:You know I mean so, but I was grow like you.
Speaker 2:I be just like you.
Speaker 1:But it's also the things you do in your own playground, just joining some playground you like one on a bill. Most of the things that are said to you during the day, can I say you said them to yourself. You said them to yourself. We have 5,000 to 8,000 thoughts in a day, 5, I'm sorry, 50,000 to 80,000 thoughts in a day. More than 80% of them are negative If you're not choosing To be mindful of what you're saying to yourself.
Speaker 2:You be the judge and the jury and the executioner.
Speaker 1:You never even got up. You know, you ran no whole thing on this here playground, never got up, never did a thing, already decided. Oh, that ain't gonna work. Facts I Tried it already. It don't work. No, the way you did it. So let's listen, I'm saying a statement that people's Listen. I ain't over there, them girls. You know, don't you gonna move on for me right now? You gonna move up on me right now, really not gonna move up on me right now. Don't make me go, michael. Who's bad? Don't make me do, don't make me.
Speaker 2:Your blood is gonna know you're gonna always hey, you're gonna always remember that about me. You can play yours on like no try, you do not like that word. Oh, if I could get an addition there, I would eradicate that word.
Speaker 1:Hilarious what. I Think that all words have different levels. Mm-hmm, I think that all words have different hours have words, have power and they do.
Speaker 2:They have power and I call it a spelling. It's a spell.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Wow, how to spell.
Speaker 1:You rude, my goodness. So I just you, okay. So you got your morning routine, you got your water all day. You're gonna keep the. What is the one thing You're not gonna allow to be introduced back into your normal.
Speaker 2:Who do you just say it? Negativity there it is. Even people like I, like how you just see me move on. Yeah, I'm walking on people all the time. I am very picky about who I led to my circle. Yes, I'm very. It's like the draft over here you can get drafted and you can get traded, yeah, and you can get cut listen. I just thought about that one in my head.
Speaker 1:Yes, that just came up. Listen, that is. That's such a true statement, Because you can be the MVP one year.
Speaker 2:What did you say?
Speaker 1:Man, you can lose that whole year You're going to be like what happened to us.
Speaker 2:What's your call that you used to? No, I'm going to hit them with the old. I can't.
Speaker 1:You need a meme. Yes, you need a meme, so I'm going to need you to film that. I need you just to walk up next to anybody, just so I, just I. I want to ask you something. Yes and please.
Speaker 2:Can they hear the music too? Yeah, oh shoot, I know y'all enough.
Speaker 1:You thought it was only you. That music is there for a reason, it's so that that. Thing inside of your brain is thinking but that entertain side is entertained.
Speaker 2:That's me right there.
Speaker 1:It's there for a reason. You did that I, I, I Get out of my head.
Speaker 2:Don't you be doing your magic on my head, making me talk?
Speaker 1:That is nice and really nice and relaxed. Aren't you looking to the?
Speaker 2:No, I'm very. Actually I don't want to talk to you.
Speaker 1:You angry, oh you ready to battle. Is that what you saying? Is that what you? Is this a fact? Are we battling right now, we virtually battling right now, don't make that battle. Right now.
Speaker 2:No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I don't want to hurt nobody feelings. I don't want to hurt your feelings. You know this, your this, your show. So I'm going to let you shine right now, I'm going to let you have that, but when we in person, girl it's, I'm going it's on and popping Joe On site.
Speaker 1:You hear me?
Speaker 2:On site.
Speaker 1:On site. You better be ready. You better be ready. You better be ready On site. Listen To ask this question and I pray that you receive it. Well, I want, I want you to close your eyes. I can't touch you. What do you think I can do? Close your? Oh my gosh, you are.
Speaker 2:I'm just playing. I was there. I'm being extra. I was there, I was having a good time. It's the music. Blaming on the music. Close your eyes Okay.
Speaker 1:Breathe deep, let it out. Breathe deep, let it out, let it out. Imagine that you had one last conversation with your mom and you're able to tell her Everything that's going on with you right now. What?
Speaker 2:would you tell her?
Speaker 2:The first words I tell her was thank you, you did that, girl, I would say I pray that I could be half as good as you were, and if I do that, I know I'm in a good territory. Thank you for being my rock. Thank you for putting all the good qualities of myself in me. Thank you for the discipline. Thank you for being your authentic self. It taught me to be my authentic self. Thank you for your friendliness, because I'm friendly. Because of you, I'm here, I'm alive, I'm well, my family is here, your granddaughters is thriving and thriving in life. I would be half a grateful. I always say I would have one more conversation with my mom. I would always be in a grateful gratitude mode and tell them just thank you. I couldn't even think of it. If I had said it 10,000 times, it still wouldn't be enough. Just thank you and I won't let you down.
Speaker 1:Thank you, you can open your eyes. And you see how.
Speaker 2:I can do that without no tears.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I worked on that for a long time. I had to get right, I had to mindset coach that kind of taught me how to go to that place called called timeline therapy, and go to that place and find the learnings in every lesson. And you know, I feel like I made my mom proud and I'm making her proud every day, like she's up there smiling. My mom, my grandma, my great-grandma, my dad, probably like boy, he probably out there bragging Like, yeah, I did that, that's me right there, yeah. So yeah, I feel like I did, I'm doing pretty good. Even through all my folks and all my shortcomings, I feel like I did her good, I did her proud and she's very proud of the man that I turned out to be.
Speaker 1:Thank you, god. It was received well. Trust Asking some of the things I have to ask, I'm like I gotta say what.
Speaker 2:You ain't got to, you get the privilege of doing it.
Speaker 1:Come on here, it's an opportunity.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's not only you just helped me Now. I'm gonna go do that later on. Yeah, I'm gonna do that more often and have that conversation with her, and her grave site is in Tampa, so I don't really get to see it as much as I would like, but I could do that whenever, wherever I'm at. You know, I'm gonna do that more and I thank you for even. See, I told you one plus one equal three. You just gave me something else. You just gave me something else. I tapped in just now. Yeah, I appreciate that.
Speaker 1:You have her picture there, though she's right here with you All the time.
Speaker 2:Oh, it's out there. Oh, let me show you one more picture. I'm so excited.
Speaker 1:I'm so excited.
Speaker 2:This is my favorite picture. Oh wow, that's me and her.
Speaker 1:Yes, and she looks like and she's at peace, holding you, and you look like I'm with my mom.
Speaker 2:I cut everybody else out, the family, I cut them out and I'm like cut that part, cut that part, no, no, no, no. But I was focused on her and me and all the good times we had, the life lessons she taught me. I have another picture here of me at Christmas time in like 1993. So I had to be like 12 years old. It was like the last Christmas we had together. And in the picture I'm holding I got my Sony headphones that she got me, you know, the Walkman, the Sony Walkman.
Speaker 1:Yellow.
Speaker 2:I got three black black. I'm discreet, you know I don't need all people. We was in the hood so we don't need nobody. No attention.
Speaker 2:You're right, low key, low key, and I got a hood on one of those things. But I had that and I had three games. She didn't buy me, like you know, the video game. The video game wasn't a thing back then, it was board games. So I had three games. I had Monopoly. Right now I'm in the real estate territory. I do real estate, you know investing. And she had the game of life, high life, we know, we out here living life. And then the last game was Uno numero uno. You got to take care of you first. You're the most important, the most valuable investment you'll ever have. And I looked at that picture thousands of times until one day when I was a little, not too long ago, I looked at her like dang she did that, she did that.
Speaker 1:My God.
Speaker 2:She did that. She could have gave me any games she could have gave me Sorry, she could have gave me, you know, any crazy game. She gave me Monopoly, life and Uno and some headphones so you can listen to some music like that we jamming right now. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean and you know I'll never forget that lady and you know she's definitely in my heart. She's with me all the time and I just do my best to make her proud every day. That's the best. That's the sons, that's our number. One thing in life is to make our mama proud. Here I go Make our mama proud.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, wow, so you said that was around 12, right.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:What would you tell your 12-year-old self today, knowing what was about to happen, everything that was about to?
Speaker 2:happen. That's funny that you say that, because I don't know if I would tell myself anything.
Speaker 1:My God.
Speaker 2:I don't know if I would, because everything happened for a reason. If I tell myself, maybe I wouldn't have been, you know, I wouldn't have to go through them struggle, I wouldn't know it was going to be all right later on. So I probably would have been nonchalant, I probably would not have affected me how it affected me, I probably wouldn't have the empathy I had today. Like you know what I mean, I could have messed up more. You ever seen the movie Butterfly Effect? Yeah, you go back there, you tell something and now something else. I might not even have my kids today. I don't know I would have went left when I was supposed to go right. I would have went right when I was supposed to go left. You know what I mean. So I probably would have looked at myself and I probably would have said four words, yeah, four words, you're going to be all right no hints, no clues, no, nothing, bitcoin.
Speaker 2:I thought I would have said Bitcoin 37, 26, 42, 11, 13, 19, 9 to 9, February 27,. That's going to be the lot of numbers. Ok, I can't. I would have said nothing. I would have told them you're going to be all right, bro, it's going to be all right, Even though you're going to go through some stuff, and life be lifeing. I would have said life be lifeing, but God be God.
Speaker 1:My God, yes, good luck.
Speaker 2:Have fun. No, I would have said good luck, I would have said have fun, enjoy, I'll see you soon. Make me proud. Daddy, I look at you know. Actually I looked at my picture one time and I was like I'm getting chills. I looked at my picture and I was like did I do enough? Am I doing? Did I waste your time? You know like sometimes I question myself, like you know, did I let this little boy down? Or am I, you know, making this little boy looking like, yeah, we doing this, I started it, you finish it. You know, like I say that's my favorite saying do something today that your future self will thank you for. And now I look at my picture. I be like, thank you.
Speaker 2:I look at my 345 pound self, my 345 pound self, and I say thank you, thank you for taking that first step, thank you for saying you know what I'm gonna lose this weight. Thank you Because, if not, who knows? I probably never met you. I probably been somewhere in the hospital taking my last breath or, you know, just depressed somewhere. You never know. You never know. I'm just thankful for where I'm at, I'm happy, I'm grateful. God is amazing, life is amazing. It is what it is my boy. It is what it is. It is what you make it. It is what you make it.
Speaker 1:And what I make it is what it is.
Speaker 2:Yeah, cause it could be.
Speaker 1:it is what it is, If you're not choosing to make it into something For sure. I'm intentional, though, definitely.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you've chosen to make it into something.
Speaker 1:Give me the last thing I wanna know about, cause I got to know you say you filmed Jill Scott and who else? Cause I got snow. I got snow on you, the list goes on.
Speaker 2:Fantasia, mint Condition, swv, trick Daddy, juvenile. Pastor Troy, I'm gonna go to the Spanish people. What's the name of the Spanish people I filmed? I don't know, I don't know what's the name of those Spanish people I filmed? God, I can't think of his name right now. It was so many. Fifth Harmony what's the one girl name? It's so many, it's so many, over a hundred, over a hundred people. Ashanti, jauru, fat Joe, lil Wayne, jeezy Shade I might have just turned it to a fan. I might have just melted.
Speaker 1:Yes, don't you girl, don't love it, don't do it.
Speaker 1:Listen. Okay, now pay attention, focus, listen. What was the most amazing time in that area and those times and those moments that you filmed? I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. I don't even know about that anymore. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know what we have done. I don't know what to do. I'm gonna watch that area and those times and those spaces with people that people call stars, being in that universe with them. What was the most amazing? What was?
Speaker 2:something that you're like Y'all have no idea. This person is amazingly nice. They did this. I didn't get to meet her, but Jill Scott, jill Scott, I was filming her, her do the opera version, but I felt it. I was shooting her and I was like ooooh. I got Jill Scott in my camera and she hit this one last note, right, and while she was hitting that note, I just started fading away right and that was the end of the song. And then, guess what happened? Her security guard grabbed my camera Girl. What's that verse we had, uh, you had earlier it's the time to kill and it's the time to heal.
Speaker 2:I play about a lot of things. I don't play about my money. I play about my mama. I do not play about my camera Girl. I almost lost it, but I had to remember where I was at. I got myself together and me and him were like literally about to fight, we walking back to the back, because what it was was, um, when we do film, when we film in different events, it was like towards the end of her set. You know these, these artists, be out there giving them a all or whatever and they get sweaty and they be into it. They don't be looking like how they look when they first came on. So, with a high radio you supposed to only film like the first three songs and in my head I'm like, well, shoot the first three days to be warming up, right. So you know it looked cool. You know what I'm saying. But they just be warming. They don't be seeing all the hits and the classic that we can't even fuck.
Speaker 1:So it sounds like they just need to take a break, go back there, powder and towel down powder up and come back out.
Speaker 2:So me being incognito. You know, I just had the camera right like this, like I'm just in the crowd with the camera. You know I'm actually hired to be there to film, but I'm not supposed to be filming Right.
Speaker 1:That's a certain point. I couldn't resist it. So.
Speaker 2:I filmed it. Um, he calls himself. I had it right my neck, so he called himself get right my camera. And he do be too big and I didn't care nothing about that. I'm from the hood hood like I'm from Duval Duval, and we don't care. No, all sizes can get it, it don't matter. You know you got parts from there that are small all ages it don't matter, grandma can get it.
Speaker 2:She touched my camera. No, I didn't say that. I didn't say that. I didn't say that. No, she didn't touch my camera though. So funny story.
Speaker 2:So we walk in backstage and we arguing. He was like you got to erase all that. So I'm walking and I'm like man. I said she ain't. No, she was like the last person, she was like the headliner. I'm like man. I don't record it in this whole show.
Speaker 2:If you think I'm going to erase all this. You got one thing coming in and, first off, you ain't going to touch my camera, no more. That's the first thing. But I even erase. Just got a nobody. I would say it like that. You know, I'm like just god, I don't care about her. You know, I would just be at all extra. And um, he was like man, you got to erase that. So while we talk, walking and talking me being the smart, clever guy that I am I take the memory card out of my camera. I had two cameras one on my hip, one around my neck. I take the memory card out of my camera, put it in my pocket, take the empty memory card, put it in the camera. I said you know what, forget you, and forget you, scott too. I said I'm finna erase it. Yo, look, look, I'm finna erase it. I hit the little erase button on my camera and I said look. And he said okay.
Speaker 1:I said you know what I'm gonna erase it again I push it again.
Speaker 2:And and then I'm like you, you happy. I said forget you and Jill Scott, but I said it'll look colorful. You know, he was like he said, that's what I thought you. He was all cocky too. He was feeling himself, he's security. He posed too and um, I still got that footage to this day Shoot everything.
Speaker 1:They should have never said that in that box.
Speaker 2:Yes, they should have. That was for me, that was for me. Wow, that was for you.
Speaker 1:That message was for you.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:What do you want? The? Next message to be in the next box that you open with your camera. What do you want it to say to you?
Speaker 2:Girl you asking so good question. Good job Marion. Miss Swingler, good job Dang. The next one, I would say you know what I wanted to say I'm gonna be high life till I got no life.
Speaker 1:Come on here, but what sounds like you about to start selling cameras.
Speaker 2:Sound like it. Sound like it. That's what it sounds like, don't you? Just you. It's because of you. I'm gonna give you a five percent Listen.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna give you a five percent you think she ain't gonna take it.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna give it to you.
Speaker 1:And you think she ain't gonna take it.
Speaker 2:Worldwide. I don't care if it's a Polaroid camera.
Speaker 1:Oh, that would actually be hot. Mm-hmm, I'm just saying Because this generation didn't get the opportunity of seeing it actually in your hand and waving that joint. That and seeing it actually come to life, develop Holding yourself in your hand.
Speaker 2:Hmm.
Speaker 1:I'm just saying.
Speaker 2:I gotta hit up Ella Elyon, I'm gonna be calling you soon. Get that trademark, copyright, that patent.
Speaker 1:Let her know.
Speaker 2:Hey, fun fact, guess what? What? You see this on my head High life, it ain't just play, play. Ella Elyon has helped me acquire my trademark for high life and it's in the works right now as we speak on this episode. By the time, whatever, I should have the trademark to the word high life.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Imagine that Wow.
Speaker 1:Look at him now. Mama Look at him now. You did that, yes, look at him now. You can look at the little you and say, see, we are.
Speaker 2:Thank you.
Speaker 1:We are.
Speaker 2:Do something today that your future self would thank you for. I just got chills again. I'm just gonna be a chilly little Boudou All day long.
Speaker 1:I appreciate you showing up for a conversation and then hanging in there for an actual recordings.
Speaker 2:You did that.
Speaker 1:You did that.
Speaker 2:We did that.
Speaker 1:We did that. Look at that. You know why. You know why Because one plus one, what an equal. Give it to him, baby.
Speaker 2:Give it to him Don't get your kids in trouble now. Make sure you know how some explanation behind it. Don't get your kids in trouble in school. Tell them I said no, one plus one equal three. No, explain it to them.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Explain it to them yeah.
Speaker 1:We're not talking about the math that you need to write on the paper for the grade. That's not what we talk. We talk about that mathematics, that calculation, you need to be doing for yourself. This here's the battleground.
Speaker 2:Thank you for Put some respect on your mind.
Speaker 1:Put some respect on your mind with Mr High Life Films is self George. Thank you for being here. I appreciate you for being here.
Speaker 2:I'll be back again. I'll be here. I'll be back again. I'll be here. Confident you, confident me, confident you, confident me, confident we, confident us, and that's what it's going to be, yeah. That's what it's going to be.
Speaker 1:You heard it here. That's what it's going to be Confident you, fam. Give my man some love. I appreciate you. Thank you so much. Oh, my fire, sir, fire.